It's been awhile since I posted here. This space is where I feel safe to share almost anything because the only people who read these post are the ones close enough to me to care (or the ones that accidentally come from random Google searches). Although it is late, I am still going to wish you a happy new year.
Ever since my last post, I have been struggling with some emotions. So to avoid all the "Why you so emo?" I have decided to not post at all. But on the contrary, I have been spilling my negative thoughts on Twitter so I still got my "Why you so emo?" anyway. I won't elaborate on why I am sad, but let's just say that the universe doesn't care if you are happily settled or terribly miserable with only one dearest thing left, if it wants to have an earthquake it will have an earthquake. You have no say over it.
There is some kind of fear when you are about to succeed. Some may understand this but most would not. It is that fear that once you say the word, hand up your paper, or publish a blog post, all your efforts will go to waste because even though you've tried your best, you still failed anyway. Thinking of success is a risk, just like how falling in love is also a risk. But without that last step, your effort is worthless.
Tell that to the my pile of half completed music compositions, the 'I love you's that weren't said, and the person who waits for the time to run out even when she had finished the paper during an exam long before the given time. They need to hear it. The person behind it needs to hear it.
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